Tony Fernandez at a kopitiam

Posted: August 3, 2014 in Uncategorized

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Spare a thought for Uncle Tony F, Chief Executive of Air Asia”……

Arriving in a hotel in KL Sentral he went to the kopitiam and asked for a cup of teh tarik. The seller nodded and said, “That will be RM1 please, Uncle Tony.”

Somewhat taken aback, Uncle Tony replied, “That’s very cheap,” and handed over his money.

“Well, we try to stay ahead of the competition”, said the barman. “And we are serving free cup every Wednesday evening from 6 until 8. We have the cheapest draught in Asia. Now Everyone Can Drink!”

“That is admirable and your drink a remarkable value”, Uncle Tony comments, smiling delightedly.

“I see you don’t seem to have a glass, so you’ll probably need one of ours. That will be RM3 please.”

Uncle Tony scowled, but paid up. He took his drink and walked towards a seat.

“Ah, you want to sit down?” asked the seller. “That’ll be an extra RM2. You could have pre-book the seat and it would have only cost you a Ringgit.”

“I think you may to be too big for the seat Sir. Could you sit in this one please?”

Uncle Tony attempts to sit down but the seat is also too small and when he can’t squeeze in he grumpily complains “Nobody would fit in that little seat!”

“I’m afraid if you can’t fit in the seats we have you’ll have to pay an extra surcharge of RM4 to sit in one of our adjustable luxury hotseats, Sir.”

Tony swore under his breath, but paid up.

“I see that you have brought your laptop with you” added the barman. “And since that wasn’t pre-booked either, that will be another RM3.”

Uncle Tony was so annoyed that he walked back to the bar, slammed his drink on the counter, and yelled, “This is ridiculous, I want to speak to the manager!”

“Ah, I see you want to use the counter,” says the seller, “that will be RM2 please.”

Uncle T’s face was red with rage.

“Do you know who I am?”

“Of course I do. You are Mr Fernandes.”

“I’ve had enough. What sort of kopitiam is this? I come in for a quiet drink and you treat me like this. I insist on speaking to your manager!”

“Here is his e-mail address, or if you wish, you can contact him between 9 and 9.10 every morning, Monday to Tuesday at this free phone number. Calls are free, until they are answered. Then there is a talking charge of only 10 sen per second provided you use our Hotel Tunes Talk. Using any other mobile carriers would incur our normal charges of 30 sen per second.

“That’s preposterous! It’s impossible to even complain like this! I will never use this kopitiam again.”

“OK Uncle, it’s up to you. You are free to use or not to. But remember, we are the only kopitiam in Asia selling a cup for RM1. Now Everyone Can Drink!”

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